April 26, 2024

HR brand and HR marketing – pathetic profanation instead of real benefit

Considering how tired I am to death of corporate buzz about HR marketing, HR branding and all sorts of crap aroundthem (hysteria is not yet comparable withAdjail-bigdata-blockchains, but strives for them), then it's time to speak and understand the essence of the phenomenon. And at the same time I’ll immediately sketch about information security in companies, because all this fuss is things of the same order and one nature.

The first error

HR marketing is not about frills and team building andother. These are not HR's wet dreams that they will finally do SOMETHING GREAT so that their boss will finally appreciate and stop wiping the department's feet. This is not a won “HR brand” award, which has nothing to do with reality at all! And these are not idiotic measurements of the level of happiness of employees, after which almost nothing changes anyway!

This does not prevent the company from being shameful shit in the face of scarce personnelwhich even in a crisis is not so easy to get.

The second error

Information security is not badthe brain in any garbage is a security. This is not reading correspondence of employees, cameras, mini-cell in the office and not wiretapping calls. This is not a breakthrough of regulations that prohibit just about anything. This is not regular swearing when security guards turn tender documentation into prayer to call Satan.

All this in no way interferes with regularly draining client bases for three rubles and enclosing client cells.

HR brand and HR marketing - miserable profanity instead of real benefits

Where should it all begin

HR marketing and HR brand, as well as information security,starts with intelligible management, motivation systems, realistic career lifts and a healthy corporate culture. So that at least it’s not nasty in the officework. That the working day was not like staying in a concentration camp or a psychiatric hospital. That common sense and competence should be the main theme at all levels, and not occasionally and in some places. And so that the office would not want to take out and sell in parts, but to voluntarily work for a common profit, clearly understanding WHY AND WHAT everyone does.

And this is more complicated than hanging software, prohibitions inwrite instructions, arrange a wiretap, and then conduct trainings with coaches, invite facilitators and run in bags with booze in a country hotel to arrange.

HR marketing in Russian

Take two simple, understandable at the same timeclassic examples of typical HR marketing in its real Russian performance. Where it was enough to immediately include at least a little common sense - but naturally, common sense contradicted the intentions of company management.

EXAMPLE 1

Rosa Khutor is the country's leading ski resort.Potentially, it could be prestigious to work there. But here's the story: their office is located in the village of Novinki in the Istra district of the Moscow region. You can't walk from the nearest train station. The regularity of buses from Tushinskaya metro station can be viewed here. Who do they ultimately want to hire for the company—residents of Krasnogorsk? Istria? Nakhabino? Workers living close to Tushino who will never be late for the less frequent bus? Yes, everything is simpler. Some of the top guys are tired of cutting into the capital along the stagnant Novorizhskoye Highway. And I decided - what the hell, let the slaves come to me themselves. And I’ll rent an office in my village cheaper - profit! And I can walk to work in about five minutes. Well, ok, I’ll organize a minibus for the suckers from the master’s shoulder.

And top decisively put that in this way henarrows the primary recruitment funnel, and even quantitatively fewer people will be able to see it. Not so much quality. Then the same manager will wonder why they hired the wrong people again, and why those who are needed put up a prohibitive price list or simply send HR officers straight to hell. And why “there is no one to work with, there are only idiots around.” So you yourself, comrade, are the first cretin on the list - because you yourself cut off your own choice. And at the same time, business opportunities. All for the sake of not having to drag your ass to the car, but at the same time living comfortably outside the city. Now you can at least win the HR brand and attend at least a hundred seminars on HR marketing.

EXAMPLE 2

The example of Rosa Khutor is not the only one. There are dozens of such only in Moscow, where the lackeys themselves must crawl into the gardens to the master, so that the master's ass has the option not to drag himself anywhere. And that example is still relatively "normal." But there is one agribusiness (sorry I forgot the name), where the head office is in a fierce ass on the Kaluga highway in the cottage village, where the master generously remade the extension to the cottage under the office. In the okrug, of course, apart from dachas, there is nothing, slaves need to take food with them, the road to the village and to the dacha is broken up in the best Russian traditions. The corporate minibus is exactly one and leaves exactly at 9 am to the office. I won’t be surprised if the local tsarok fiercely demands more leads from her personnel officers and wonders why they can’t hire anyone normal.

HR brand and HR marketing - miserable profanity instead of real benefits

Why an HR brand won't help you

All this fuss with the HR brand and the one with the same nameThe award appeared for approximately the same reason why Russian business people love Internet marketing and all sorts of branding concepts. That is, there’s absolutely no point in straining yourself, not building processes, not treating the mess, but using packaging to cover up the critical shortcomings of the product, or even simply trying to wrap blatant crap in gift wrapping. And then hope that the end client will not notice the smell of feces.

A true HR brand means exactly a few things:low staff turnover, fast closing rate even for scarce vacancies(because the candidates themselves want to get into the dream company)and high long-term financial return per unit of staff(which in normal marketing, and not ersatz for HR personnel, is called the buzzword LTV - life-time value).That is, the company must ultimately be more than profitable. Again, with the prospect of long-term profit. And not like WeWork, which some Vedomosti journalists masturbate at, where profitability combined with personal enrichment were at the expense of investors. The result is a criminal case in the USA and the main investor (SoftBank) is in shit from head to toe.

And alsoHR brand means no major reputational failures, which most likely will not suit the HR department, but someone else in the company.

For example, PR managers or top management. Or all at once - if you look at Aeroflot, where the Superjet crashes, and the company is to blame for the suitcases, not the pilots. Where the cats are hated together with the passengers instead of a clear explanation why the cat had to lose 2 kg, and the owner of the animal did not engage in circus. Where srach with the labor union of pilots for pay comes almost from the time of the USSR. Where it turns out that the widow of the deceased in a Superjet accident needs to prove moral suffering in court in order to get compensation. Don't you find an excellent employer Aeroflot? Directly, their HR brand shines over the capital of the Motherland and all the best people strive to work in it.

As well as at the Sheremetyevo Airport, where there is noseparate quick security entrance for employees and no benefits for Aeroexpress. That is, pay 1000 rubles every working day to leave and come to work, and stand in the overall long line for inspection. And for being late, of course, we’ll give out in the ass. As you can see, all conditions have been created so that the best people of the country work at the airport named after all of us. Then they can’t find movers for the summer and the mess around luggage begins.

And, of course,HR branding means NO video outputson the channel “All works are good” and the like. What “Sportmaster”, “Magnet”, “Tinkoff” and others already managed to regret, where the shit inside the companies got out. Which of course added to the desire of people to work there, right? Because in the "concentration camp" and "mental hospital" to work so fun and pleasant!

As you can see, in Russia it is not very difficult to become an out-of-office office, but an HR brand ... Well, how can I tell you ... Buy a prize more simply ... Of course, win in a difficult and honest fight!

HR brand - wet dreams of HR greatness and dirty wretched reality

To understand what is really wrong with HR-delirium in Russia,just look at the nominees and winners of the “HR-brand” award and compare with what is in reality. In the end, to see that this is just another attempt to buy yourself a piece of reputation on the labor market for three pennies instead of fully earning it.

Here are the 2019 nominees.“Pyaterochka and Eldorado are already quite good. Just about “Eldorado” there will soon be an issue on “All works are good”. After which, for sure, the chairs of their top management will light up as brightly as those of Sportsmaster. About “Pyaterochka” - just watch a video about “Magnit” on the same channel and imagine that Pyaterochka is “Magnit”-light. Great candidates. Moreover, there is also “Oriflame”. Are you serious? MLM as an HR brand?! Maybe we’ll also add MMM with Cashbury there? Or the PRIZM pyramid - Dzhigurda and the crouching Dima Vasiliev were very pleased with it!

Now let's look at 2018. Aeroflot with the “Work Focus” special nomination forthe most interesting HR projects aimed at increasing the importance of work in production, increasing the involvement of employees of working specialties and building respect for working people in society. I am sure that Aeroflot pilots and passengers of the burnt Superjet appreciated this. “Burger King” with the nomination “Equal Opportunities”, about which (equal opportunity to wash the floor at one in the morning) is more than clearly shown in “All worksare good." “Digital transformation of HR” was taken by Rambler, in which chaos and reshuffles already seem eternal. And among the nominees was the MLM Amway (why not just NL International?) and Luxoft, whose stories about their scams and scams are full of Ebanoe.it. Where is this IT company called nothing other than Lochsoft? In general, everyone in these companies wants to work because their HR brand is at an unattainable height.

2017 - Euroset asaward winner. 2018 – video about Euroset on the “All Work is Good” channel. The HR brand lasted exactly one year. Perishable goods, no less. Then Oriflame was again the winner - no, but what? It’s strange that Mavrodi was not there - he was still alive then and gave the opportunity to keep a lot of people busy. And McDonald’s with Burger King, about which you can again watch a video on Oleg Assa’s channel. Well, the bankrupt infogypsy university “Synergy” is among the nominees. I’m sure you’re still eager to work for these companies.

Continue further or you already understand thatThe “HR brand” award is such a poor attempt by the company to show itself better than they are,like any “Product of the Year”, “People’s Brand” or “Brand of the Year”? And that all these attempts have nothing to do with building a normal HR brand and normal HR marketing. Justclassic corporate bipolar disorder.

HR brand and HR marketing - miserable profanity instead of real benefits

With one hand we make garbage, with the other we beg for prizes, and we believe that the prizes will save everything and decide everything. And they will increase the managerial ChSV of course!

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P.S.And what personnel officers understand now as HR marketing - I will delve separately. If anything, I will cry with bloody tears and vomit on the carpet for you.

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Original post: https://zen.yandex.ru/media/id/592d3ad87ddde88dbd5af2da/propavshie-dengi-btce-milliony-maizusa-novosibirskie-energetiki-i-bitsmedia-5dd129d36e8b7e61c05bddec

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